Mancation

This weekend, a few of us have escaped to a house on a lake to do what every man does when given a gorgeous weekend on the water... Watch football. It could be sunny, 85 and packed with loose-moraled women and their will still be an ass groove on the couch for 8 hours tomorrow. Unfortunately, this week has all of the makings of a total letdown. Why? Remember the stacked weekend of college games two weeks ago? All we got out of that was Michigan-Notre Dame. Everything else... Lame. And then last weekend, with nothing to really keep our attention, we get thrillers.

So, in honor of the masculine overload of the weekend, we are going to make sure all of the games are close by picking them that way, because there is still no science to understanding who is good this year...

#16 Stanford at Notre Dame +4.5
The luck of the Irish is apparently just an expression. Although, I guess there is no luck when your special teams is woefully unprepared for a fake FG attempt; or your secondary is too slow to rundown the Michigan QB. Stanford is unbelievably impressive so far, and is there a hotter stock in coaching than Jim Harbaugh? This week will be a very easy theme for this week: Best QB wins. In this case, Andrew Luck is infinitely better. Not for the long run, maybe, but at this stage, absolutely.
Stanford 42, Notre Dame 35

West Virginia at LSU -10
Ten points?!?! Vegas knows something that I just don't. LSU will win and play good defense, but they are as shaky at QB as the NFC West. But, what is our rule? Best QB wins. Okay, I guess there are some exceptions. But, I think this game is a BOB; The Tigers are just too shaky under center to cover the 10.
LSU 27, West Virginia 20

#12 South Carolina at #17 Auburn -3
I doubted Team Spurrier two weeks ago and it backfired, mainly because I did not respect the Cocks defense enough. And, honestly, don't we always underestimate the Cocks defense? But, on the road in the middle of nowhere Alabama? The Tigers were the darling, black sheep pick in the SEC this year, and the War Eagle will be loud. Normally, I would say Garcia has a slight edge at the QB position, posing quite the dilemma at this stage. However, the ire of Spurrier is hard to fight, and Newton will shine at home.
Auburn 17, South Carolina 13

#24 Oregon State at #3 Boise State -18
If I was a doubter of the Cocks, I was a hater on Boise State so far this season. I am so sorry, Broncos. While Jaquez Rogers poses a problem, does anybody remember what the Broncos did to Va Tech's running game? Or how they went on the road last week to Wyoming and opened a mile-high can? And, back to our quaterback argument: Kellen Moore wins that battle without a fight. Everybody I am sharing a cottage with this weekend is betting (hypthetically) the Beavers. 18 is a lot. Not this time, Broncos, because I am finally a believer...
Boise State 41, Oregon State 20

#1 Alabama at #10 Arkansas +7
Where is Keith Jackson when I need him, because this is the granddaddy of them all. I am more excited for this than the entire week 2 schedule. I am now convinced that there are good teams this season, some great teams (most in the top 10), a couple of championship teams (OSU, Boise, Oregon) and then there is Alabama. A different league of team. They have the Heisman Trophy winner, who is honestly not as good as his backup. They have the best total package of wide receiver. They have gazelle speed on defense. And now the QB argument... Do you take Ryan Mallett and his arm and pro potential, or do you take Greg McElroy, who hasn't lost a game since he hit his Peter Brady stage. I take winners. And I take Alabama. Every time, every place. Now, the spread? I'm actually not going to pick this game against the spread (I'll push it)...
Alabama 27, Arkansas 20

So much for picking them close. If this weekend progresses the way I expect it to, a 50-point blowout should still be entertaining.